Knights Radiant and the Magic Parking Spot
Roasted by Matt Mireles
You act like you are giving birth to a digital god, but your real spiritual center is a paved square in the California suburbs.
Matt, this is Roast dot F-M.
Look at this gathering. A-I Tinkerers Orange County on Tuesday, June second, twenty twenty-six. The event site hypes this shit like it's some underground billionaire bunker. It promises a rigorous technical barrier, capped and limited to exactly fifty hand-picked practitioners. Oh, and it also says right there on the exact same fucking page that sixty-two people RSVP'd. You guys have million-token LLMs and zero comprehension of counting.
Then you scan your peer group. Consider one of the key speakers at this supposedly rigorous event, David Parkhurst. This motherfucker submitted his corporate job title to the public as, and I quote, "Knight Radiant and Architect." Matt. You spent years plunging your bare hands into chaotic bloody tragedy as a South Bronx medic. You shed normal humans because they were too annoying and fragile to fix your code, only to share a stage with a guy larping an invisible dragon sword in front of an open-carry PowerPoint.
These people claim to wield Claude Four Point Seven. They want a post-training post-biological future. Yet when you read the printed testimonials from this brain-trust, their mind-bending takeaway from the Singularity was, "perfect venue... parking was really easy."
You stripped humanity out of the workplace just to stroke a spreadsheet about decent municipal zoning.
May 30, 2026